Women Don't Have Political Beliefs

Recently, I started dating a black liberal woman who anti-racism posts.

I’m not the most extreme person there is, but I know that if she actually knew what my politics were, should would break up with me instantly.

But I actually hold these beliefs, and how do I know? I act them out. I want kids. I am moving toward that goal. I believe that men and women are created differently, and thus when I date a woman I treat her a certain way. I (gasps) expect her to cook and clean. I never force her to, I politely direct.

That’s going to stir some bees up.

Now, on to my lady.

She’s an anti-racist. Presumably, she “believes” that white men need to atone or whatever. That all white men are bad. That we as white men are evil.

All that being the case, why is she dating a white man? Why has she never said anything about me being white, ever? Why has she never asked me to repent for slavery?

Because it’s not real. She doesn’t believe these things like you think she does, and in fact, stated political beliefs have almost nothing to do with actual female behavior. This is not my opinion. It’s documented.1

The anti-racism. The feminism. Practically all of female liberalism itself, is a giant evolutionary and cultural level frame test, and half of all men are desperately failing it.

Now, I say she hasn’t brought these things up, but that’s not entirely accurate. She has alluded to them, and this is where things gets complicated.

Why hasn’t she escalated to full on “do you believe in anti-racism?”

Because if you’ve gotten to that point, you have already failed multiple frame tests, and are probably on your way out. She did frame test me on this topic a multitude of times. Here’s how those tests went.

She asked me how I felt about gender. I gave her a non-answer that was polite. The average man would not have done that.

She then mentioned that the BeeGees are black white people. I thought that was funny personally. Then she said something that alluded to slavery and generational trauma. I did a crazy move and said “there is actually some scientific evidence supporting the idea of intergenerational trauma interestingly.” She said “there’s a lot.” I smiled and said, “just a little babe.” Take note of that non-yes and non-no. It’s very important.

The average man thinks political questions from women are about the logic of his beliefs toward that subject. That is incorrect. A question like that is an emotional stability and social etiquette question wrapped up in the disguise of a political question.

There are many correct answers to a political question like: what do you feel about gender or black people have generational trauma.

“That’s not true” or “There are only two genders” are not right answers.

Neither is “I support transgender rights” or “White people need to atone for the harms they’ve inflicted on black people.”

I know this is strange, but stick with me. You might think that if the answer isn’t saying you disagree then it would have to be agreement, but that’s also wrong.

If you agree, they see right through you. They understand you are trying to grovel and appease them. They sniff your weakness, and they are disgusted by it. It gives them the ick.

This is one of the toughest things I learned about women, but once I figured it out, it completely changed my interactions with them.

The correct response is dancing the line of agreement and non-agreement by staying emotionally grounded when they say these crazy things, and by stating a version of your real opinion, that is disguised in a playful quip that avoids logical argumentation.

What does this look like?

If your girl says, “You’re reading a book about Andrew Jackson? The trail of tears guy? Why?”

You say: “Because he’s interesting” and remember, the content of this is only 50%. If you say this defensively, you’re cooked, but if you say it with a playful smirk and continue the conversation forward, it will be like it never happened.

What if she says “I think gay people should get married”

You say: “If they want to be as miserable of the rest of us, why not” with a smirk.

That’s it. It’s not about the literal content of your response. It is about your playful indifference to her “opinion.”

If you take one point from this article, remember this: women are emotional creatures. Their words are not complex philosophical statements designed to explain the nature of the world to you. They explain the nature of the social world they are in to you.

This may reveal some things about their personality, and you might say you want someone with a personality just like you, but are you sure about that? If their personality was just like you, they’d basically be a guy. Women aren’t men. They are inherently different. They way they use words is inherently different from us.

They aren’t political, logically driven beings. They are chaotic social emotional beings that need a stable ordered force to be complete. You express your order by not chimping out about some random political statement your girl makes while out at the bar. That’s what a masculine, stable presence does. That’s what she wants. She doesn’t want a 3 hour Jordan Peterson lecture.

Once you realize this, once you realize that women aren’t begging for philosophical conversations on dates, you will have a much better relationship with women.

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Baumeister (2000). “Gender Differences in Erotic Plasticity: The Female Sex Drive as Socially Flexible and Responsive.” Psychological Bulletin, 126(3), 347-374.

Note: This is one of the craziest studies ever done. Long story short, Baumeister pretty conclusively shows that not only are female sexual attitudes malleable over time, more so then men, but also that their behavior often simply does not match what they say at all. In other words, they will telling you they are a raging feminist that wants a nice guy, and still sleep with Chad Thundercock.